Some “not bad” news

So tonight, I had CAT scans of my abdomen and thorax as an outpatient at a clinic in the centre of Paris.  The ambulance firm had lost our booking, and eventually arrived to pick us up ten minutes before the scan was due to begin.  Not the best start – “Ambulance de Triomphe” not particularly earning the moniker so far.  Still, they got us there in a miraculous twenty-five minutes, through the Metro-strike-jammed chaotic heart of Paris, and waited patiently afterwards while we waited for the scan results.  And… for us to have a run-through of said results with the clinic radiologist.

That I was not expecting.  I’d thought we’d go, have the scans (in fact, scan singular: originally the lung scan was due for next Monday, but they squeezed both in tonight), and trundle off in merry ignorant bliss awaiting the hospital interpretation next week.  But in fact, I have news.

The stomach ganglions are “much smaller” – “hardly there”.  This (we asked several times) is definitely a Good Thing.

The lungs are “different” – there’s something there (the radiologist thinks an infection of some kind) which is blocking the view of anything cancerous beneath.  (And, incidentally, he thinks causing my chronic cough.)  But whatever’s beneath apparently wouldn’t have got any worse, or we would see it.  So this is a point of confusion, but not bad news.  I’ll see a lung specialist at the hospital next week, when I go in for chemo #4, and we’ll see what’s going on.

My liver and kidneys are completely clear.  There is no further spread or metastasis visible on the scans.  My kidneys are “nickel“, apparently – squeaky-clean; both stents (the tubes stuck between kidneys and bladder) still well-placed.  I’ve been seeing a lot more blood in my urine the last few days, but this is apparently almost certainly just the stents doing their thing, and nothing to worry about.

It’s very, very difficult to get excited and let go, and I’m wondering at my reserve (which I think is coming across in this post, too) but I think I can definitely say this is… not bad news.

Cottage pie getting cold, so no time for editing or reflection, so I’m just going to post.  Love to you all, from shocked-of-Paris.